Tuesday, 29 January 2013

Liebster award. :)

Wow this is a wonderful surprise i got nominated for the Liebster Blog Award. Thank you so much for nominating me Riena Summers :)


1. Tell 10 random facts about yourself
2. Answer my questions please
3. Nominate 11 bloggers with least than 200 followers
4. Write 11 questions for them to answer.

10 Random Facts

1. I'm a Libra. That means I'm always striving to balance things out.
2. I love giving away gifts to people. Gifts on no occassion is my way of expressing love. :)
3. Trying to be a Judge someday means, in real life, I try to be the least judgmental, ofcourse I fail at it.
4. Apparently, I look like a serious person, but the ones who know me, know that I really have the laughter bone in me.
5. I love to laugh, dance, sing, smile, cuddle, hug! (There's a lot more to it ;))
6. Birthdays are my favourite days. My calender begins and ends on my birthday.
7. I love my work (which is to study for the next 3.something years) and I do justice to it.
8. I love secrets. I canvas them as hard as I can. 
9. I think I have the OCD. I am exceptionally clean and tidy. And anger means I start cleaning again, till there's nothing left to clean again.
10. Black is my favourite color. That means, 99 percent of the stuff I own is black. 

10 Answers for Summers.  

1. Names don't make a change to anything. Let's resort to addressing me as Purple Assassin! :)
2. Blogging. I think it's been almost 2 years with this blog. But in the last 4 years I've switched in between selecting and deleting Blogs.
3.The fact that I can talk about things I can't to people, is what I love about Blogging. This serves as a place where I confess things to myself!
4.Just checked out! You have an amazing Channel! :)
5. I would embrace the Zombies! as the Zombies would include a few friends of mine ;)
6.I'm more into Pop. The slow romantic kind. My recent favourite is Flightless Bird and Thousand Years!
7.Actually, I am in sane! ;)  
8. Sorry Summers, I prefer Winters ;) Gives me time to cuddle up! :)
9. Hell it is. :)
11. Of course I'd be your friend :) 


1. Momina
2. Raj
5.The Guy in the Mirror

11 Questions for the Nominees!

1. What is your real name? Why did you chose the current Blogger Name?
2. Which color do you like the most? 
3. What is one thing you found hard to confess about yourself? The one you didn't even mention in the prior confessions?
4. Do you let the child within you come out often?
5. Do you really read people's post before commenting? :P 
6. Do you confess about Crushes or do you like to hide it away?
7. Chocolates or No-chocolates?
8. Have you been to India? Is it one place you might be interested to visit?
9.  Do you believe in God? 
10. Do you think of dying often or maybe killing yourself?
11. Will you be my friend?[Loved the question Summers, so had to follow you at it ;)]


Saturday, 19 January 2013

The Birthday.

January 20th, a few years ago.

The day would begin with a rather delighted insight and lot of happiness in my head. S's birthday was equivalent to my birthday. He was my best friend. More than that sometimes. Growing up right beside him from the time we started off with the scratches meant he was practically family. He would come by the morning, refreshened, touch my parents feet, like we do to elders as a mark of respect and pretend as if he didn't care if I didn't remember that it was his birthday today. I never wished him until I felt it was the right time to wish him, pretending as if I had completely forgotten about this day. He'd try and give away every possible hint to make me realize how special it was a day for him, I tried to behave like every effort of him failed. One year, I made him angry enough to be in tears, not talking to him at all, we were probably ten or twelve back then. Being his best friend, I always knew what he wanted the most on his birthdays, I made sure I had what made him happy.Opening the gifts together, was the most cherishable memory we shared together. It lasted each year, where we recollected the stories of the past years' gifts and the significant change in what he received as the years grew by.

 20th January 2009.

The last birthday he got to celebrate. His 16th. The 17th year of his life began the night of this date. We were together, his family, he, and I along with my sister. He cut the cake giving away the first piece of it to me along with the dimply smile that can't find a way out of my world. I gave him a hug before drenching him with the paste of icing and coke. It lasted as long as we enjoyed. Later that night when the parents had fallen asleep, he sneaked in from my balcony. We lied on my bed watching TV and eating the little cake I made him for. We danced a little, till my sister fell asleep. As the morning sun seemed almost visible along the horizon I lied on his arms swinging in the swing. He said that this would be our every year story. Every birthday we'd wait for the sun to rise. With that he moved a little closer, closed his lips within mine and pulled me a little closer along the neck. That was the last birthday of him we celebrated ever.

 12th January 2010 he saw the last rising sun. There were no 20th January's since then. 

Friday, 11 January 2013

3 years...

Let's talk about it.
How it has been, within these 3 years of not knowing you.
Not knowing that you're around.
Not knowing that you love me too.
Not knowing that you have my back.
Not knowing that there is a tomorrow with you.
Not knowing that there are times of being spoiled by you.
Not knowing that I can rely on you no matter what.
Not knowing that your nose is closest to mine.
Not knowing that those dimples are the only things that make me laugh with tears.
Not knowing that I am me..
                                       'cause I am not me without you.

Three years.
It's been 3 years since I've been really happy.
That accident took away more than just you.

P.S. It's 12th January again.

Friday, 4 January 2013

Longing Confessions.

Sometimes, the mind doesn't know what's missing, but the absence can be felt. A couple of nights ago, a dream told me that in the next few days, I wouldn't find peace, neither with-in nor with-out.
I wandered in the remains of an old fort, all empty, by myself, searching for the one thing I couldn't find, not knowing what it was that I was searching for.

Silent murmurs in his voice blew with the flow of the air. There was a thunder then. Like the sky was about to cry. The window pane came crashing down and the wooden shelves were left open. Came with the strong wind were the letters I had lost, forgotten about and left behind, the one's he had written. long before he was long gone.

A tree trunk fell off the tree and crashed my head with the blow of the wind.

Exasperated. I woke up with a little ache in my head, only to find those lost letters in the little bed side table right beside me.

I don't really how things work here in this world. I am exhausted. Exhausted after spending so much of time in searching those answers. It leaves me behind with wrath all the time.
What more had the tears to offer? A lot of pain. Again.
This wait has been too long. And somewhere it doesn't seem to end. Death seems to take away a lot along with it. A Lot.