Friday, 4 January 2013

Longing Confessions.

Sometimes, the mind doesn't know what's missing, but the absence can be felt. A couple of nights ago, a dream told me that in the next few days, I wouldn't find peace, neither with-in nor with-out.
I wandered in the remains of an old fort, all empty, by myself, searching for the one thing I couldn't find, not knowing what it was that I was searching for.

Silent murmurs in his voice blew with the flow of the air. There was a thunder then. Like the sky was about to cry. The window pane came crashing down and the wooden shelves were left open. Came with the strong wind were the letters I had lost, forgotten about and left behind, the one's he had written. long before he was long gone.

A tree trunk fell off the tree and crashed my head with the blow of the wind.

Exasperated. I woke up with a little ache in my head, only to find those lost letters in the little bed side table right beside me.



I don't really how things work here in this world. I am exhausted. Exhausted after spending so much of time in searching those answers. It leaves me behind with wrath all the time.
What more had the tears to offer? A lot of pain. Again.
This wait has been too long. And somewhere it doesn't seem to end. Death seems to take away a lot along with it. A Lot.

15 comments:

  1. You're right, it can be exhausting searching for those answer. But maybe that's a sign that rather than finding those answers, that we are supposed to let the answers find us...

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  2. People say tears wash the soul. I say tears bring up useless memories that tear open healing wounds. Searching for the right answers or the out-of-reach something is so tiring. Waiting is even more difficult because of the urge to do anything.
    I can honestly relate because I have these moments as well...
    xoxo
    Sarang

    Life's Perceptions

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  3. You would find your sun shining soon.
    Honestly, I am overwhelmed after reading the above post. No, deadth has'nt taken away a piece of life from me rather I've never got what I've always craved for. A smile of her, all that I ever wish but...well let the memories remained shelled. Tears are dried, its vaccum that I fell.
    Well, you write brilliantly. Your emotions are embedded in your words.
    Keep Writing ! :)
    Smile, its the best remedy.

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  4. Tears may seem good at the time but afterwards they leave with nothing but emptiness!
    Search for these answers is i think the reason that we keep going in life....keep struggling!
    Nicely expressed! :)

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  5. I guess we shouldn't worry about the answers ... they will reveal themselves at the right time :-)

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  6. The regret and sorrow are palpable. Powerfully written.

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  7. People always tell you to leave the past behind and move on but it's not that easy, isn't it? Sometimes the past experience are embedded so deeply in your thoughts that it could emerge anytime even if you don't recall it. Hope the New Year will bring sunshine to your life. Take care!

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  8. Grief can be paralyzing too. Hope you break out of it soon,and find answers and peace as well.

    ✗ℴ✗ℴ ♡

    +To Me It Matters+

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  9. Well Written...
    There is a brighter side to every dark side
    A day will come which will put an end to all our pain
    with this Hope we shall live!!!!

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  10. There would be no shadow without light...

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  11. i remember, those times when you feel incomplete. when allthough you are on top of the world its just not enough. right then i asked myself what i really wanted.

    the answers i got weren't complete. but i did get hints. i started chasing the hints. and now all i can think is, what more does one need?

    keep writng brother.

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  12. sort of a grief that words hardly express fully...

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  13. shit. didn't realize. honest mistake.
    forgive me? :)

    ps: bata deti to bhi samajh jaata.

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  14. You have your way with words..
    Great blog, really! :)
    You got yourself another follower!

    visit me at http://hopeihadasuperexcitingsecretlife.blogspot.in/

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  15. Your writing is really beautiful. Your words make me feel the way that you do. I'm very inspired by the emotions that your blog conveys.

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